Friday, April 26, 2013

A quote on new friends.

While I was checking my blog stats a couple of days ago, I noticed that people had been viewing my old blog entries. Then I saw one familiar entry where I quoted a character from a web series that a friend of mine was in. The quote felt appropriate for me now.

"Kahit gaano ka pa kilala ng mga pinakamatalik mong kaibigan, minsan may mga darating pa na ibang tao na magpapakita sa iyo na ang bago tungkol sa sarili mo. Maaaring sila ang magpapakita sa iyo kung saan ka magaling, at kung gaano ka kagaling. Pero sila din ang magsasabi sa iyo na may mga bagay ka pa na pwede mong ayusin. Dahil hindi pa sila nakakahon sa mga inaakala mong limitasyon mo. Dahil sa totoo lang, yan ang rason kung bakit tayo nakikipagkaibigan. At kahit matatalik mong kaibigan ang mga nakakakilala kung sino ka ngayon, minsan ang bago mong kaibigan ang magpapakita sa iyo kung anong kaya mong maging."

It definitely sums up this interesting chapter right now. When I took a big risk and resigned from one freelance job last year, I had no idea where I was going, as I was starting from again from square one.

I remember that I would always say that I could never dance to save my life. But here I am now, a little over 2 weeks as a scholar, dancing ballroom with 16 other scholars, all ranging from ages 11-26 (well, 31, now that I'm one of them). And the funny part is that here, no one knew who I was before I came into their world. No one knows who Hogi is. They only know of this crazy person named Christine who suddenly barged into their world.

As I'm still getting to know each and every one of them, the quote above really sums up everything. Anyway, despite how big the age range is in this group, I've grown to love all of them, as if I've gained a whole bunch of talented younger brothers and sisters with their own crazy quirks.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

A new scholar in the house.

After yesterday morning's technique class, I got a little happy surprise as the LeBran team officially welcomed me as their newest scholar! It felt really great to finally be one of them, and it's good plus to not worry about expenses for classes anymore (which was always a huge factor for me because lessons are pretty pricey).

How appropriate for it to happen on that particular day. Exactly last year, also on April 9th, I was sending a confirmation email about sampling a ballroom class before I had to consider taking it seriously for the first time.

Mommy Val had said that it's always important to be grateful, which I am to them. I always appreciate everything they had done for me, beginning from day one when I had first met them and was warmly welcomed to their classes.

Once again, I give my heartfelt thanks to our teachers, Sir Brando and Teacher Belinda, plus Kuya Mauw, for imparting every bit of knowledge they offer to all their scholars and students, and also to Mommy Val for keeping all of us in check, for everything else and for simply being a great mom to all of us. Thanks as well to all of the scholars, those that I've danced with in every class and hung out with outside class hours and beyond. Every class is never boring with you guys always around. You've become awesome friends and adopted siblings to me. Sorry guys, wala sa budget ko na mailibre kayong lahat to celebrate, hahaha.

Thank you for this opportunity and for believing in me. It inspires me to do even better.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Now what?

The last time I had liked a guy, I decided for the first time to take the risk and tell him that I liked him. I got friend-zoned within minutes.

It didn't really bother me all that much, because I already expected that to happen. Plus knowing he's been a good friend for several years already prior to liking him, there's a big possibility to wreck the friendship with that, especially when he had admitted that he's not looking for a serious relationship, and I wasn't as well.

Moving on to the next guy. Which is actually the current one what I was so torpe with all this time. I was smitten, and very torpe. I chose not to say anything due to professional reasons. And a lot of other reasons. Plus the big factor that I will probably be friend-zoned again.

I've been noticing that we've been teased a lot because we hang out a lot together. I don't know if I was already being pretty obvious, or they're just basing it on the fact that I'm always with him more often than the others. We joke around a lot, up to the point that when he teases me a lot, I would tell him that I hated him. And he would quip that it never fails that when a girl tells that to him, she would end up falling for him. Ugh. A bit egotistical, so I decided not to tell him how close he was to the truth.

Then I couldn't help it. I finally decided to tell him (via text like the last guy) on a day before the Holy Week weekend so I didn't have to face him right away in case things got awkward. He laughed and said that he said that he knew he was right about what he said before about any girl telling him that she hated him. Wow, confidence levels are sailing all the way to the top, aren't they?

So I guess he didn't mind that I liked him. But that was it. Nothing else. He didn't even say anything about how he felt or thought about it, only that he knew that it was going to happen.

So now he knows.

Now what?


Then there was a small event this past Saturday. He was one of the performers and I was just there to help out, just to give back to the teachers who have been so generous in teaching me everything they know, and to the others who have been there with me as well. During the event's closing remarks, we heard the subtle quip of him being in a relationship. Everyone chuckled, while I was sitting in the corner, avoiding any eye contact.

Later that day, I found out that he was annoyed about that comment. It may be far from the truth, but he didn't like it.

I don't get it. So what if it wasn't true? Why are you so affected by it? I mean, you're the only one who really knows I like you. The others are just assuming things.

I doubt he'll read this. He claims he's a lazy reader. But we'll see.

The only thing I like about this whole situation is that nothing's awkward between us. I appreciate it that you still let me bug you in my times of boredom.

But that's it.

Now what?