over

I got this prayer from Iam's blog before.

Lord, as I put my trust in You, grant me the Wisdom to know when to hold on, when to let go, and when to move out in faith. Amen.

How appropo.

I've been having this feeling since last month. I even joked about it with myself. Then I saw a little something earlier this week. Then someone confirmed it.

What hurts the most?

Not finding out from the source. Nagmukha pa akong tanga kasi alam na ng iba tapos ngayon ko lang nalaman.

It's partly my fault, really. Nanggugulo kasi ako eh. Mas lalo tuloy naging mahirap pag-isipan.

What hurts even more? Sa text ko pa nalaman nung nanggaling na mismo sa kanya. Hirap daw kasi bweluhan. Meaning to talk to me for quite some time now, but couldn't get around as to how to do it.

So we talked. Just half an hour ago. I didn't care how much it costs, I used my mobile phone. There, he told me everything. Oh did he? I have no idea. The conversation led to another thing, so as to distract me, and I welcomed it. Ended the conversation on a good note. But I can't say that I'm fine.

Masakit pa rin. Alam ko na magkakaroon pa ito ng aftershock bukas. Mas lalo na sa Huwebes. Pero di naman pwedeng magmukmok lang ng magmukmok, diba?

I'm in denial, really. But at least he still made me laugh right down to the very last minute.